Road Map for Life Seminars:
Recovering From Childhood Trauma: Breaking The Cycle Of Pain
Imagine being 4-years-old and the person you trust most, the person you are totally dependent on for everything, is too drunk to fix your dinner or tuck you in bed at night. Or maybe they are attentive one minute, distant the next and so angry an hour later that you're afraid to say anything or even ask for so much as a glass of milk.
For millions of children, life is filled with fear, confusion and sadness. They never know what t expect in their home. Will Daddy slap them to the ground if the speak too loud or cover them in kisses? Will he sink into sullen silence or break out in song? Will he be there tomorrow? The trauma can be as obvious as the bruises and bumps of physical abuse or as subtle as the look on a child's face ever being emotionally abused with criticism.
For these children, trauma is not a one-time event. It's a way of life. It's the kind of chronic trauma that chips away at a childish heart until he or she turns stone cold inside just to survive another day.
Children who grow up in homes where chronic trauma is rampant, assume that they are to blame for all the chaos in their lives. They must be defective, they believe. They must be bad seeds. Why else would their mother or father behave the way they do? They may develop different defenses to cope with the chaos. Some may do a really good job of hiding what they feel. Others turn numb inside. All of them carry the pain of childhood trauma inside them.
The desperation, guilt and shame that surrounds childhood trauma does not go away once a little boy matures into a man or a girl becomes a woman. Adults might act as if they have forgotten about the horrible experiences of their past. They might even convince themselves that the trauma of their childhood was not so bad. But the trauma of yesterday settles into the soul and stays there. It cannot be wished away or forgotten.
It not only stays there, it gets passed on to future generations. Children who are traumatized grow up into adults that do exactly the same thing to their sons and daughters. Sometimes it's difficult to notice. Others times it's so obvious it cannot be ignored. But in any case, it hurts the child, just as it did the parent so long ago.
There is a way out of the pain. Parents can learn about their own childhood trauma and stop behaviors before they hurt their own children through acts and words. It is possible to change and stop the pattern. But to do that parents must understand how trauma occurs and come to grips with what happened to them. They have to see how being overly critical, controlling or shaming can hurt children. They have to understand too, that parents who traumatize their children are not bad. They would do better if they could.
There is a way to break the cycle of abuse. This seminar offers a way to begin facing trauma for our children's sake and for our own.
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